Gaza Calling!

Silence of Broken Dreams

Silence filled the ambiance around, as clouds slowly started to gather and merge. My heart beats grew faster as I felt the imminent storm, with a steady breathe I inhaled the gloomy vibes of ominous flavors.

Rainy weather and vicious storms wildly came through, as I held too tight into safety, to what I believed is security, clutching with both hands firmly using all my power and strength, I clinched to you with my heart and soul.

With every beat of my frightened heart, a prayer was mumbled in un-spoken words that could not be heard, but only felt.

Canvases of wishes and dreams formally painted by passionate colors of love were washed away and swabbed loosing the engraved souls and carved spirits from within its amorous images to blend and unite with the falling rain drops.

As I watched chaos all around, with a blurred sight I felt my hands still clinging to what was a rope, but now is nothing but a slight thread, I could feel my tears drop. I could feel my heart stop for a second, as I shrug, as I shiver, and my whole body quiver.

Soaked palms shudder only to loose grip of that tiny string, and I fall deep into the darkness, where only silence exists and emptiness fills.

This Love

What has this love ever offered to me?

Nothing more than a glass full of humiliation

Sipping it into my soul, filling it with mortification

I find my self trapped in a cage of confusion

Surrounded by gloom and shadows of mystification

Of endless questions un-answered

Puzzles unsettled

Mysteries unsolved

I crave

Deeply yearn for

A little bit of security

A sensation of stability

To mend these open wounds

To heal these deep injuries

To forgive

To forget

To live

And to Love once again

Back Once Again - It is.. It Could Be

I was sitting here for more than an hour thinking of how to start this post. It feels strange to come back and write again after such a long time.. Its been about 6 months since I last posted anything around here.

I dont know If I should start by giving you my reasons for not posting, but you already know that I'm sure, since I'm not the only blogger who disspeared for a while, and you all know the reasons for bloggers going offline all of a sudden.

Maybe I should start by telling you all the things I've been through during this 6 months, career wise, family wise or for juicier gossips, emotional wise ;)

Maybe in my next post, I'm in my office right now, 30 minutes left for the end of day, and I am feeling a bit sick so I'll have to take off and leave.

I think starting up with some poetry pieces I've written but never posted here would be a good start, if you never were a fan of my poetry, then just read it for the sake of knowing whats been up in my life. I'm sure you do know how my peotry describes my whole life story!

Here's one of my two-faced poems, I wrote a while back in September 2007.

As always your feedback will be highly appreciated.

p.s: I missed this place!

It is.. It Could Be..

Soon, you’ll be gone
And all of this will be nothing but another sad memory, to hang on your wall of memories...
But did you ever think? Did you ever wonder? What is it to me?
It’s a wound that even time cannot heal
It’s a scar that will always be there for me to see
It’s a memory that every night will haunt my dreams
It’s a thought that will eternaly play hide n seek in my mind
It’s a hungry tiger looking for its meal
It’s a cloud that will rain only above of me
It’s the tear that will always stop me from smiling
It’s the darkness on my face which will never be shining
It’s the child of shame that I will always carry in my belly
It’s the bullet that will always stay inside my heart
Killing all the love I once had for you
It’s the wall that will always stand tall
Between me and my dreams and happiness
It’s the final act, final season, final chapter
In the story of my blossoming life
It’s the crack in a beautifully pained wall
It’s the spot in the almost- perfect picture
It’s the stain in the bright white dress
It’s the hurricane that shattered my rainbow sanctuary
It’s the end of who I was, and the end of who I should have been
It’s a beginning of a new soul-less, heart-less and love-less me
It’s a wound that will never heal
It’s the end of what should have been, you & me...

Wait a minute, I can be positive..

Ya Allah, I am your child...a
ccept my apology, forgive my sins..
Embrace me in your arms once again..
Ya Allah, I am still stuck in this twister of love...
Ya Allah, Bless me, bless us, and bless our love...
Ya Allah, Help us be strong.. Guide us and shine your light above us..

It could be the beginning of new better me
If I flipped the page and started with a new white oneIf I did, will you?
Most importantly will they?
I will move to a new phase, be a new person
But will they forget. Will they forgive?Will they rip off that stained page for me?Or will they keep it for black mail and abuse
Will we learn our lesson and do it right
Like we should have ever since
Will you hold on to the good memories?
Will you be strong without me?
Will you still think of me and still want me?
Will we be blessed by the lord this time for doing it right?For taking his directions, his words and rules
We failed our first test, can we make it through a second?
Should we take our chance?Or should we respect and learn our lesson.

Ya Allah, so many times you warned me...
So many times I was stubborn and wouldnt listen..
Now, I realize.. I understand.. I comprehend..
Now, I come crying back to you so dont shut me out..
Ya Allah, fill my heart with your loveFor its eternal...
Ya Allah, shower me with your loveFor its unconditional...
Ya Allah, I beg you to never leave me
Ya Allah, I plead, never abandon me
Ya Allah, have mercy on my lost, confused soul
Ya Allah lighten my way
Ya Allah, Strengthen my spirit
Ya Allah, show me the way back to you