The relationship between men and women; an argument that is as old as humanity. Secrets of love, how to maintain a perfect love relationship, how to withhold a marriage, how to get the man/woman you want, and an endless list of such topics that had been discussed, researched, and written about by several writers, researchers, therapists and even scientists. Nevertheless, with millions of articles and the numerous books and publishing's that can be found either in public libraries, bookshops or even the world wide web, millions of people around the world still suffer on a daily basis from emotional abuse, unhealthy relationships or only continuous mind and heart confusion that might as well affect other aspects of their lives, if it is family, friends or even work in a very negative way, making one fall deeper into depression and sink in an endless ocean of commotion that is not easy to get out of.
In the next lines, I am not trying to state my personal theory about love, nor am I planning to give away -what I believe- is an ultimate solution for this eternal predicament; on the contrary, I will only write about my endless frustrations, and my previous dramatic experiences.
The no. 1 problem in every relationship between two lovers is and has always been "trust", and this might be the only point that all writers, researchers, therapists, scientists and lovers can agree on. From a more personal point of view, trust had only begun to be my problem since the summer of 2007, when my relationship with my significant other - at that time- started shaking. There was nothing crystal clear, but my woman's intuition was giving me several warnings, which were always calmed down and forgotten after a few sugar-coated words from him. Until I made the decision which can be the best or worse decision I ever took in a relationship! I decided to "test" his faithfulness and honesty. He failed! I, then knew without a doubt that he was both unfaithful and a liar.
Still, being the naive person that I am, I gave him a second chance wanting him to prove that what had happened was nothing more than a silly mistake that will never happen again. Naive I was, and an ordinary man he was, an ordinary man that would never stray away from his nature of "loving all women" and cannot kill the "lying" genes inside of him.
Fall 2007 was the season my first dream was murdered.
My true, honest, and faithful love for this "man" was flashed down the toilet, and for a long time ahead I could hardly see through my blurry eyes or breathe with that painful load of emotional baggage lying heavily on my chest.
And now, fifteen months later I realize that the scar he left is too deep to heal; as I can no longer believe in love, I can no longer feel the truth in any spoken words of passion, I can no longer believe or trust, I can no longer forgive or forget and I can no longer live love like I used to.
I play cautious, and when you're playing cautious, you lose all the fun in the game.
I engage in several conversations with my lady friends, telling them how all men are liars, it's in their genes; and that is something I wholeheartedly believe in. I tell them how all men are unfaithful, another undeniable fact. Men are complicated, they say they want a "yes" girl; but they marry the "wrong" girl. They can date you, love you, and be the best lover ever, for months and years, only to marry his cousin, family friend, co-worker, or that "bitch" who had been stalking him for years.
I read a quote online, something that says "A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle" I laughed about it, then I wrote it on my msn messenger display message, and on my facebook status, but deep inside, I knew better than anyone else, that it is not true. Women need love to survive, we need to have someone to care for, to look after, to sacrifice for, we love to feel "needed", we love for that feeling, and we also love to be pampered, having someone to run to when it gets cold outside, someone to share our moments of glory, someone to remedy our pain and sorrows. We need to have someone. We need to love.
As a conclusion, I do not think it is a matter of chemistry between a man and a woman, I don’t even think that honesty is a big deal in it, many successful marriages are based on the small little lies husbands tell their wives to keep them happy and satisfied, "fools they are I must say", and for sure it is not love that is the answer of all this mystery, as women love and give, but still get nothing but heartaches in return. So, what is the vital answer and solution that would solve everyone's love puzzles and enigmas?
You can call it luck, or like those romantic movies we indulge ourselves in, till we fall deeper in our despair, they suggest its "Destiny".
I'd rather say I am just "unlucky" in love!
In the next lines, I am not trying to state my personal theory about love, nor am I planning to give away -what I believe- is an ultimate solution for this eternal predicament; on the contrary, I will only write about my endless frustrations, and my previous dramatic experiences.
The no. 1 problem in every relationship between two lovers is and has always been "trust", and this might be the only point that all writers, researchers, therapists, scientists and lovers can agree on. From a more personal point of view, trust had only begun to be my problem since the summer of 2007, when my relationship with my significant other - at that time- started shaking. There was nothing crystal clear, but my woman's intuition was giving me several warnings, which were always calmed down and forgotten after a few sugar-coated words from him. Until I made the decision which can be the best or worse decision I ever took in a relationship! I decided to "test" his faithfulness and honesty. He failed! I, then knew without a doubt that he was both unfaithful and a liar.
Still, being the naive person that I am, I gave him a second chance wanting him to prove that what had happened was nothing more than a silly mistake that will never happen again. Naive I was, and an ordinary man he was, an ordinary man that would never stray away from his nature of "loving all women" and cannot kill the "lying" genes inside of him.
Fall 2007 was the season my first dream was murdered.
My true, honest, and faithful love for this "man" was flashed down the toilet, and for a long time ahead I could hardly see through my blurry eyes or breathe with that painful load of emotional baggage lying heavily on my chest.
And now, fifteen months later I realize that the scar he left is too deep to heal; as I can no longer believe in love, I can no longer feel the truth in any spoken words of passion, I can no longer believe or trust, I can no longer forgive or forget and I can no longer live love like I used to.
I play cautious, and when you're playing cautious, you lose all the fun in the game.
I engage in several conversations with my lady friends, telling them how all men are liars, it's in their genes; and that is something I wholeheartedly believe in. I tell them how all men are unfaithful, another undeniable fact. Men are complicated, they say they want a "yes" girl; but they marry the "wrong" girl. They can date you, love you, and be the best lover ever, for months and years, only to marry his cousin, family friend, co-worker, or that "bitch" who had been stalking him for years.
I read a quote online, something that says "A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle" I laughed about it, then I wrote it on my msn messenger display message, and on my facebook status, but deep inside, I knew better than anyone else, that it is not true. Women need love to survive, we need to have someone to care for, to look after, to sacrifice for, we love to feel "needed", we love for that feeling, and we also love to be pampered, having someone to run to when it gets cold outside, someone to share our moments of glory, someone to remedy our pain and sorrows. We need to have someone. We need to love.
As a conclusion, I do not think it is a matter of chemistry between a man and a woman, I don’t even think that honesty is a big deal in it, many successful marriages are based on the small little lies husbands tell their wives to keep them happy and satisfied, "fools they are I must say", and for sure it is not love that is the answer of all this mystery, as women love and give, but still get nothing but heartaches in return. So, what is the vital answer and solution that would solve everyone's love puzzles and enigmas?
You can call it luck, or like those romantic movies we indulge ourselves in, till we fall deeper in our despair, they suggest its "Destiny".
I'd rather say I am just "unlucky" in love!
1 comments:
hey girl..
so i guess we all have "men" issues..
but i guess we gonna do as kanye says and "keep our lovelock down"!
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